Stoicism, But for the Girls

There’s a lot to know about me on this page, but one of the things I’ve totally neglected to mention is that I’m an avid book reader. And the first book I want to highlight is The Stoic Woman: A Modern Woman's Guide to Ancient

Wisdom.

Now before we get into it, let me give you a little backstory. The first time I ever heard the phrase “ancient wisdom,” I was sitting in my local Kava spot with my friend Ricky—who can usually be found with a book, a pen, and a highlighter in hand. True to form, he was knee-deep in some thick text. Soon after, he gifted me a copy of Meditations by Marcus Aurelius. I’ll be honest—it went way over my head at first. I picked it up for a minute and put it right back down.

As the weeks went by, I watched Ricky get deeper and deeper into the text. Then, I started noticing the “red pill” guys on the internet throwing around these same stoic quotes, and that definitely made me side-eye the whole thing. But the more I talked to Ricky about what he was reading, the more curious I got.

Quick context: Ricky runs one of the most impactful nonprofit organizations here in West Palm Beach. It’s called Inner City Innovators, though around the community, they’re known as the Hope Dealers. Their work is focused on youth gun violence prevention, social-emotional learning, and so much more. I say that to say—his work is hard. The kind of hard that takes a toll on your spirit. So to watch this man stay rooted in studying, learning, and holding himself accountable despite all that... it inspired me.

That’s when I said to myself: Let me see what the stoics have to say—specifically for us women. So I hopped on Amazon and searched for something more aligned with my life, my lens. That’s when I found The Stoic Woman.

Now you’re probably saying, “Morgan, get to the point—what the hell is stoicism?” Great question. Here's a simple way to put it:

Stoicism is a philosophy that teaches us how to live well by focusing on what we can control, accepting what we can’t, and cultivating virtue.

Let’s get into it.

This post is basically a collection of my notes, highlights, and takeaways from the book—why they resonated with me and why I think every modern woman could benefit from leaning into these principles.

The four core virtues of stoicism are: Wisdom, Courage, Justice, and Temperance.

Let me break down each one through my own lens, and hopefully, it resonates with you too.

Wisdom

So what is wisdom, really? For me, it's not the absence of mistakes—but better judgment. It’s about taking the L, reflecting on it, and not repeating it.

The book encourages us to create the habit of journaling our day—what went well, what didn’t, and how our actions aligned with our values. That hit me. Because in today’s boss bxtch, get the bag culture, social media perception seems to matter more than self-awareness. But what if instead of hiding behind curated feeds and fake perfection, we documented our growth... for ourselves?

It’s not about being flawless. It’s about being able to say, “I messed up—but I’m not doing that again.” That’s wisdom.

“Wisdom accepts that while we do our best, the results are out of our hands.”

That line alone helped me with stress management. That whole “serenity to accept the things I cannot change” part? Yeah. That.

Courage

Whew—this one. Courage is a space I know all too well, and I know a lot of y’all do too. But the book flipped the definition for me. It’s not just about doing the big scary things—it’s also about showing up for the small, daily discomforts.

For me, courage is having tough convos with a friend who’s already going through it. It’s setting boundaries with clients who are habitually late. It’s owning up to my own mistakes in business. I’ve caught myself telling half-truths in the past just to avoid conflict... but that ain’t real courage.

One technique I loved in this chapter was mentally rehearsing uncomfortable moments—literally playing out how you’ll handle them with grace and integrity. The goal isn’t to control the outcome but to stay true to yourself when the moment comes.

Ladies... our names, our reputations? They matter. And courage helps us protect that.

Justice

This virtue is all about how we treat other people. A friend told me recently we’re living in an “ego epidemic”—and whew, that was a bar.

We’ve seen a decline in relationships, family bonds, and connection overall. We ghost, we gaslight, we don’t follow through. And stoicism says real justice means fairness, integrity, and—get this—keeping our word.

Now listen... I’m the queen of “I ain’t doing it if I don’t wanna do it.” Blame it on the Gemini in me. But after reading this book, I had to sit with how many times I bailed on people or commitments and how it made me look—not just as a young lady, but now as a grown woman.

Justice also means embracing interdependence. We’re so focused on being independent that sometimes we become straight-up inconsiderate. I’ve been there—digging my heels in during an argument just to be “right,” only to realize later that I was dead wrong.

The takeaway: we need to lead with our own integrity and consider the collective good in our relationships—friends, family, romantic partners. Justice and integrity go hand-in-hand.

Temperance

Whew. Y’all ready? Temperance is just a fancy word for self-control and balance. That’s it. Learning how to tell yourself “no.”

This is the one that hits home for me the hardest. I’ve struggled with self-control most of my life—whether it’s food, spending, relationships, or discipline. I love my freedom, but unchecked freedom? That’s how you sabotage yourself.

I’m saying this as someone who’s actively growing through it. I know at least one of y’all is gonna read this and feel me. For some of us, it’s food. For others, it’s men. Or money. Or overcommitting. Or procrastinating.

The book helped me see that our impulses—overeating when we’re stressed, lashing out, staying busy to avoid ourselves—are signs we’re off-balance. And when we ignore those signs? That’s when things spiral.

“Being irritated all the time isn’t a personality trait. It’s a red flag.”

Our inability to focus, that “oooh my ADD” joke, or that constant guilt loop? It’s not cute—it’s a cry for balance.

Temperance teaches us to pause, reflect, and realign. I’ve noticed the more I practice temperance, the more present and grateful I become. But you can’t do that when you’re always grinding, overdoing, and ignoring your own needs.

Ladies—you do not have to carry it all.

I challenge all of us to not just make better habits, but new habits. Start small. Say no to something that drains you. Exit the situation, the text thread, the impulse. Not because you’re trying to be perfect, but because you’re trying to be present.

We were not designed to run on Red Bull and 48 hours of hustle. We are human. We need peace. We need ourselves.

All in all, I know this post was lengthy—but if you’ve made it this far, I hope it sparked something in you.

If you want to check out the book, grab it on Amazon (insert link). It’s a quick, powerful read. Comes in paperback. If you do read it, I’d love to hear your thoughts. And if you’re a reader too, send me what you’ve been reading lately—I’m always down for a good recommendation.

Until next time,– Mo'